bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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