why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
