Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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