He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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