Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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