So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
