I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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