i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
