I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Randomize
