i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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