i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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