He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
