Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
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