about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Randomize