I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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