Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
