there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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