How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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