Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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