Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
