I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize