the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Come share oat with me in your robe
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
