She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
