I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Randomize