After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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