Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
