sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I'm really busy with my period
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