Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
two words...techno handjob
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
