lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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