We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
