he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
