if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
the liver wants what the liver wants
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
