don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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