Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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