If i come over, it means nothing
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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