I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
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