Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
