Do you still have your period?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
