The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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