So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I have post one night stand depression
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
