I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
