Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize