I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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