fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
