Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
you win again, gameday.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize