they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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