i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
