The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
So. Much. Porn.
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