Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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