and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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